on days like this

on days like this, i feel like screaming. i feel like running to the ends of the world. on days like this, i feel so alone. i feel like the world has come crushing down on me. i feel hopeless. on days like this, i wonder why am i alive.


i know i know. these feelings would go away. i would feel better tomorrow or the day after. at the back of my mind, i wonder and question about my faith to God. at the back of my mind, i feel guilty and remorse for doubting that He will make it happen. He is always there for me, i know. 


but on days like this, i just want to hide and cry. 

a glimmer of hope

these days, i have been feeling down. nothing seems to be going according to plan. each time i hit an obstacle, i gather my thoughts and focus on a new plan. now, each and every plan that i have drafted and redrafted, worked and reworked, doesn't seem to be working. 

i try to ignore it, i try to ignore those thoughts, those images slipping into my mind.. i try to concentrate on other aspects of my life but it's not working. oh how i wish, how much i wish, to have, to hold, to care, to love, something so precious, something so endearing, that without it, it cuts deep into my heart, breaking it to pieces. 

and i can't help it, in the corner of my mind, i feel somehow it's my fault. that i'm guilty. 

days like this, i seek comfort from God. i seek courage, i seek strength, i seek hope and most of all, i seek peace.

The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever.