My Dreams, My Goals.

I feel.. that I'm missing out on something. I look around my friends and feel that they have achieved more than me. Everyone's changing. Everyone looks so happy and satisfied. I'm envious. Maybe it's a case of "the grass is always greener on the other side" but I doubt so.

I think of my goals, my dreams and my achievements; I feel that I am not doing my best. I can do much more. I want alot more. Yet, I have been procrastinating. I am lazy. I am not disciplined enough. Every time I stretch my hands out and touch my goal a little bit.. I relax myself. I slack and then the goal become further and further away. I have to start all over again. Every time, again and again this happens. It became a vicious cycle. Each time I fail and have to start over again, my confidence and my hope diminish. It feels as if I'll never achieve it. It feels so far away.

Will I ever be able to achieve it? It feels as if it's been forever. If I were to ever achieve my other dreams, my other goals, then first I must achieve this ancient dream of mine. I have been dreaming about it since I was 9. Please, I really hope that I can overcome this. I hope that I can stop dreaming about it and start living it. I hope this time I have the strength, determination and discipline to achieve it.

Perhaps , perhaps, this time, it'll be different. Perhaps, this time will be the last time and the vicious cycle will stop. Perhaps...

Countdown to Christmas:- 14 Days